cool/not cool

Alright, time to detail the Destin trip. What could have been a long-weekend of drunken debauchery, turned out to be rather low-key, yet enjoyable; consequently I give you “cool/not cool, and account of Memorial Day Weekend 2005”…

Not cool: We get on the highway and I realize I forgot my cell. TURN AROUND. Get back on the highway and I neglected to notice when 75/85 split. TURN AROUND. Continue on the correct highway.
Cool: Despite my early-morning-retardation, it only took us five hours to drive there - and between our lengthy/random discussions, and our interpretations of every song that came out of the speakers, it felt like no time at all.
Not cool: We quickly discover the “cool” place to be (Sandestin hotel) is guarded like Fort Knox.
Cool: The beach is frickin’ beautiful – green/blue water! This is a great luxury for anyone who usually is subjected to the cesspool that is the Atlantic Ocean.
Not cool: The beach is really short (that statement is misleading)…meaning, from the street to the water is about as long as two horizontal Yao Mings.
Cool: We find an obscure hotel that has one more available room.
Not cool: The room was $130 a night. The “Destin Inn” was nicer than expected, but it was undergoing renovations and certainly was not worth $130. That’s economics for you, supply and demand; we were demanding to not sleep in a sand-covered civic, and they were supplying overpriced beds.
Cool: We go to the local night attraction, “AJs”. We slurped down some oysters, drinks and played a game of “check-each-other-out” with the guys a few tables away…the night appeared to have potential.
Not cool: All of a sudden the bar was overtaken by bachelorette parties and ‘bamans. I’m sure people from Alabama are very nice, but the accents. The accents! Anyway, cute boys didn’t have the testes to approach, and we were annoyed by our surroundings so we left…and went to bed.
Cool: Covert Mission: Infiltrate Sandestin is a success.
Not Cool: Apparently, there are about 10 Sandestin hotels within a 15 block stretch – we infiltrated the wrong end. Instead of joining the rocking beach party, we joined the Kradinksy’s for a wild game of shuffle board.
Cool: An odd maintenance man appeared out of nowhere and hooked us up with a free parking pass for the entire weekend. I thought we at least owed him one sexual favor, but Kris frowned upon that.
Not cool: We try to avoid the masses by going to Pizza Hut for dinner and still wait an hour. This is around the time we decided to not go out that night. (you can disregard my “25 going on 18” post, I meant “25 going on 65”)
Cool: Despite our anti-socialism we still buy vodka for the hotel, get shitty, and have naked pillow fights all night long (I may or may not have fabricated that last part…just trying to keep the male readers happy).
Not cool: Crazy-man and his family decide to create a sand memorial right next to our beach chairs; it was intense – American flag in a large mound of sand with a laminated list of veterans displayed, AND the words “Freedom is not Free” written in the sand. Best part, crazy-man had some red liquid (my guess, he pricked his children’s fingers) and colored in the word “Free”. So all day passersby assumed we created this radical war monument. Awesome.
Cool: no speeding tickets, no arrests, no piercings or tattoos, no fights (besides the naked/pillow variety), a lot of rest, tan bods = fabulous weekend.